"I am capable of looking on the bright side, I just don't do it very often..."

Heifer's had her water meter installed. Spikey won't be happy at that. Then again, Spikey or as he will be known from now on - Dislikey - isn't known for his cheerful outlook on life. Indeed he could teach Morrissey a thing or 2 about Misery.

Still no danger of him drowning himself. Now he's on a water meter, it would cost him too much to fill a bathful.

He's spent all his money on Coke.